Rightful heir of the Futanari throne.

[Joffrey Baratheon]

*Sighs* So this is the royal brat I have heard so much about Hmm? *walks upto him and slaps him across his face* Go before Lady stark and let her face fuck you, you little shit or guess what your getting fucked by your own little dick! *jacks off into his face hitting him in the eye* Get lost you little incestous mutt! *turns on the spot vanishing leaving a single stain on your royal shoes that reeks of cum as she leaves you hear a wicked cackle and a scream of joy as well as pain*

Are you high? You just stood there blabbering nonsense and stroking your penis. Get out of here you disgusting elk.

You're back. I figured someone finally poisoned you but no such luck it seems.

Don't kings have people to do that for them? Heh, I can imagine Joffrey's thesis; "101 reasons why I'm such a mommy's boy".

My lowly alter ego said that, It's embarrassing really that I have another side of me. You are actually funny, do you want to be my new fool?

Methinks the King doth protest too much. As a humble Grand Maester of the Second Rank, may I suggest lamprey pie to cool the temperamental fires of late onset puberty? In all the Seven Kingdoms, I'm sure at least one comely wench can be found to keep an eel beneath her skirts. One eyed, perhaps, and likely to spit in your face when aroused, but still a rare enough treat for any man. The fish, I mean. Not even a one-eyed Wildling from Beyond the Wall would dare spit in your face, Sire!


*Yes, I know a lamprey is not an eel, but why confuse the poor boy?

Your title suits you jungle girl, you are as brute and uncivilized like those dothraki savages. I pity your kind, you even have sex with your dog, disgusting.

[rachaelross]

That's funny, I was down by the Mud Gate just this morning and someone was saying that you had sex with your dog too. Such a brute, you must be very brave to take on a Hound that big! My own pet is somewhat smaller, but if it please your Grace, I did name the dog Joffrey in your honor. He's such a cutie, all bark and no bite, and...Hey! Where did he go? That silly Sansa must be teaching him to play dead....again. You should really do something about her, my King. She's not quite right, if you take my meaning.

[TakeTheKnot]

Your majesty,
it's a surprise and a big honor for us to welcome you to your palace.
Excuse the behavior of some of us. Most of your subjects in this palace are from over the seas, Astapor and even more exotic places, that's why they have not heard of your mightyness and are kinda barbaric. Same goes for me, but it would be an honor for us to serve you.

[Olivria Noel]

I put it to you;

Shouldn't a futanari be the ruler of a futanari throne?

Unless you've got some boobs beneath that tunic. In which case, welcome.