Rachel Rocket Saves The Day!
Story by StickyLongCockings
Itâs not easy being the sidekick, you know? Youâre never the hero â someone else beats up the baddie, and youâre stuck in the background while they get all the praise. You never get to DO anything â youâre the annoying one, the one who always gets captured â or worse! My least favourite thing about it, though? The dicks. Lots and lots of dicks. And I donât mind âmildly unpleasant people who make fun of you behind your backâ, either (though thereâs a lot of them too!). I mean literal cocks. Fat, throbbing, veiny cocks. The Mistressâ cock (yes, she calls herself that. Sheâs such a bitch- But donât tell her I said that!) is pretty bad, but Iâm used to it by now. Mostly used to it, I mean. But, well, she calls me her ârape baitâ. Itâs exactly what it sounds like. My job is to cause a, ahem, âdistractionâ. Not that it ever happens on purpose â they always get me afterward. And then, of course, she makes me thank her for the rescue by gobbling down a king-sized helping of baby-batter. Yum.
Oh, sorry. My nameâs Rachel Rocket. I think thatâs a pretty cool superhero name, but The Mistress doesnât. So people call me âBallseyeâ. Iâm not quite sure I get the joke, but thereâs definitely one there.
So I bet youâre wondering what I can do, huh? âWhatâs her power?â is what youâre thinking, right? Or maybe you just want me to get to my latest adventure. Iâm not psychic, jeez! Iâm just kinda fast. Not, like, speed-of-light fast â you can definitely see me running â but I am faster than most people. Like, I could totally win in the Olympics if, you know, theyâd let me in. I also have a pair of- Well, theyâre not really horns anymore. The Mistress, she had them sanded down so theyâre just a couple of nubs on my forehead. I tried to stop her, I told her I could do more damage when theyâre sharp! But she said something about ratings and blood. Or rapings. Iâm not sure why she always whispers.
The phone rang, and I really didnât want to answer it. It was The Mistress â I could tell by the picture of her floppy, frankly massive willy filling the screen. She only calls me during emergencies, so I knew I was in trouble. Sure, thereâs justice to be done and evil to be fought but⦠Well, my butt still hurt, and Iâd only just managed to get the stains out of my cozzie. I chewed on my lip, watching it, daring- Hell, forcing myself not to answer. If thereâs one thing Iâm scared of more than rushing into the unknown, itâs The Mistress. I held my breath, keeping perfectly still. I donât know why, maybe I just thought she could see me somehow. Eventually, the moans echoing from the device faded away as she got to the answering machine. I began to let out my breath, but almost choked when she called me again, this time from her Super Emergency phone. The sound of flesh slap