Short stories! Snow White / Little Red Riding Hood?

Alright, these are the stories I wrote. They have no sex in them at all and are only meant to be a bit amusing. Their short stories I wrote some time ago...

Snow White : The 'true' story

Well I suppose the hero got to tell the tale 'his' way. Well I'm tired of being portrayed as some evil villain out to do wrong. This time I'm going to tell things from my point of view, and you are going to listen. It started way back so many years ago. I married her father, and we were happy. I was doing my best to rule the Kingdom with Snow White's father. Little did I know that the arrogent Snow White would try to get rid of me, just so she could have her father to herself. I had for awhile suspected her, knowing something was wrong but not sure what she was up to. Infact, it was only one night that she poisoned a cup of whine and had given it to her father, thinking that I would ask for it. She was wrong ofcourse, and she poisoned her father.

By the time we had found out what had happened, it was too late to save him. I was so saddened that I couldn't use my white magic that I began to turn to using black magic in an attempt to bring him back. Everyone knew what a spoiled brat Snow White was. She was passed around like a bottle of rum more times then I can count. Naturally, she drugged her father to make sure he would never discover the horrifying truth. Something had to be done and I was the one to do it. Looking for a ritual spell from a book of black magic, I found a way to both bring my husband back and get rid of Snow White.

I had ordered a woodsman to take her out and bring me back her heart. In those days I had a bad habbit of asking the mirror if I was the hottest thing around. I suppose those anti-depressents weren't helping much either because I could swear that the mirror was talking back to me. It told me that Snow White was alive and laying well. I denied this piece of news because I knew that my doctor warned me about seeing things that weren't real. I mean I'm not some evil queen out to kill her daughter out of jealousy afterall.

Little did I realize that Snow White was paying visits to my doctor getting birth control potions. Appearently she was sleeping around with seven little dwarves. A bit furiated when I found out from my doctor's assistant, I decided to use my power to get rid of her once and for all. For starters, I forclosed on the mortgage of that lovely cottage that the dwarves owned. Afterwards, I took steps into securing Snow White's character destruction once and for all. In my general opinion, anyone like her doesn't belong being famous.

Anyway, with my book of spells I decided to do something to hear that would ensure that no man lay with her again. Taking an old gender allergy potion I found once, I began to put it on some of my prize winning apples that I raise every year for the kingdom's fair. If there was one thing that Snow White could never resist, it was an apple. A nice red shiny apple that co